Wednesday, January 27, 2010

To Say Goodbye


It is not easy to say goodbye, I have done it a lot. You leave! You depart from what is known and comfortable. You leave friends, family, love, belonging. You go out in to the uncertain and the new, you leave yourself open to winds that can blow you anywhere, this why I do it is it not? I can only stay so long, then I need to go, to see the new and experience that wind. I wish I could stay longer to say "OK this is where I will make a stand and relax a bit", but I have to move, it is not my final resting place. It is a feeling, not a desire. It is inherent at least with in me. I did not create it or wish it. I am curious. I never feel I fit in somewhere and I am always searching for that next view around the corner. So, to go is not always a bad thing, it clears out the old and the used, and it lets the new in and the freshness to start again, to say "cut" and to "paste" later on, to let the time heal and the space balm the hurt. When I cross the door again, the same door I left months ago, then all is new, fresh and ready to start again.
But parting is hard, I have never gotten used to it, I always hurt when I say Goodbye.